*This post has been co-written along with Alex from The Berger Bungalow
Confidence.
As a woman, society teaches us that we are supposed to have confidence from day one. Our hair is supposed to be long and luscious, our faces are supposed to be blemish-free and glowing, and high heels are to be worn when dressing up. While we see this every day on TV and in movies, it’s not natural. In fact, most of us struggle every day with self-confidence. It’s easy and seemingly normal to feel like we are not the best person for the job, not the most beautiful, or not the best partner, friend, or daughter. It’s become normal to compare ourselves and feel inadequate or not enough. Feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt can eventually lead to a state of depression if we keep believing these negative ideas about ourselves.
This is an issue that has been prevalent in society lately, with mental health awareness being such an important topic. As women (and not only women, but EVERYBODY) we deserve to feel confident about ourselves – to feel like we are definitely the best person for the job, and we absolutely deserve success. We are MADE for our job, we are MADE for our partner, and we are MADE for the life that we are in. Everything happens for a reason. You may not know the reason right away, but it will be revealed to you in time. No matter what hardships, successes, losses, celebrations, struggles, or wins that come your way, there is ALWAYS a reason behind it. A reason that will lead you to something even better later on. I want you to remember this in 2020 and go into this new year with confidence in yourself.
Here are a few ways to build your confidence throughout this next year:
Start With Your Morning Routine
Confidence starts every day when you wake up and your morning routine can play a big role. If you start off on the wrong side of the bed, your day seems as if it’s already ruined. But this is all just perspective. You can change your perspective at any point during the day even if your morning gets started in a not-so-great way. Imagine how much better your day would be if you went through it with a happy and positive attitude. You have the ability to choose your attitude and determine how your day goes.
I would recommend waking up a bit earlier (maybe 5-10 min) in the morning so that you can have a slower start to your day. You don’t want to be rushing first thing when you wake up. Also, your first instinct may be to grab your phone as soon as you wake up, but instead of immediately staring at your screen, get out of bed and get moving. Take a shower, brush your teeth, pick out your outfit, and make yourself a good breakfast. To save even more time, I pick out my outfits for the entire week and put them in order Sunday evening.
Another idea is to grab a journal and write down a few thoughts each morning – how are you going to make your day great? Or what you are looking forward to that day? Doing small tasks like these before checking your inbox will definitely help you elevate your morning experience and curate a sense of peace and joy, which will help boost your happiness and your confidence levels each morning.
Pay Attention to What You Are Putting Into And On Your Body
Take a look at what you are putting into your body. How are you eating? Are you drinking enough water? Being “healthy” is a huge craze happening right now. (And I put happy in quotes because to this day, I have not found a definite definition of what is healthy). There are more and more fresh, organic, “healthy” food places being built as our society moves towards putting better/safer ingredients and nutrients into our bodies. And I am all for it!! What you put into your body has such an effect on you – your body, your mindset, your energy, and your confidence. Choosing foods that are low in sodium or sugar and high in protein and fiber are typically your best bet. Try a salad with a mix of ingredients such as cheese, meat, veggies, and nuts. My boyfriend recently introduced me to a healthy and delicious salad with mixed greens, feta cheese, avocado, pecans (or walnuts), red onion, black olives, and olive oil. Change the toppings as you desire. If we spend our days eating McDonalds, we probably won’t look or feel the best. If we focus on healthy and nutrient packed meals, we will more than likely look better and feel better, which is the key to increased confidence levels.
Furthermore, sometimes we can feel less-than-perfect just from what we are putting on our bodies. For example, some of us feel great when we cover ourselves in our favorite perfume – the scent makes us feel more confident because we smell good. Or we feel beautiful when we have our full-face makeup on. But did you ever think that perfume and cosmetics could have health side effects? Sadly many perfumes on the market have chemicals in them that can have major negative health effects such as headaches, irritation, and respiratory issues. Cosmetics and skincare have artificial or harmful ingredients that can cause skin conditions and even cancer. There’s nothing less confidence building than knowing the things you enjoy could be bad for you.
Evaluate Who You Are Spending Time With
Are you spending time with people who bring you up, or put you down? If your friends are negative people, do you have the ability to rise up even when they are pulling you down with negativity? It’s hard to stay positive around people who create negativity. Surround yourself with people who make you happy, people who you can laugh and joke with, and people who you can be yourself around. If you want more positive-minded friends, make connections with people on social media. I have found some of my best friends through Instagram.
Have a Positive Mentality
Last but not least, know that confidence starts from within. You can put on the perfect outfit that makes you feel great, exercise + eat healthy to make you look and feel great, and try to start your morning off right each day, but if you don’t feel well mentally, none of this will work. Now more than ever, people are battling with depression, anxiety, and massive amounts of stress. You can do it all to feel great and confident in 2020, but if you are dealing with underlying stress and anxiety (or depression), you will never feel your best and unfortunately, it can be hard to tackle those issues on your own. That’s why I would recommend talking with someone. For anyone in the Atlanta area, I heard of a great counseling place called Ray of Hope Counseling Services from my friend Alex.
They offer therapy in Lawrenceville, Marietta, Alpharetta, Conyers, and other locations all over Georgia (they have eight locations + online therapy). They have many areas of expertise such as equine therapy, individual/family counseling, stress and anger therapy, etc. And they can help with a wide range of concerns like anxiety, depression, trauma, addiction, and so much more. Confidence starts from within and if you are having trouble with any battles, Ray of Hope Counseling Services can help you navigate them so that you can build up your confidence levels and feel your best during this next year, or even the next decade!